Skip to main content

Ramadhan Is Here Again... Alhamdulillah



Ramadhan always reminds me of my late father.. he left us exactly 10 years ago this month.  How fast time flies, I can still remember how I sat by his grave and wept like a lost child.  Sad, lost, sorry, regret.. all jumbled up inside me and I have no words to best describe how I felt that morning.  My dress was soaking wet with my tears and sweat as I sat there by his grave till noon.

How I wish things were different then but I truly believe that these are all His plans for me.  After I graduated, our lives caused us to drift away from each other.  We were busy within our very own circles and I only saw him once or twice in a month.  When he was sick, he stayed with me and I looked after him for a few months before he left for KT in early 2015.  That morning before he left my house.. was the last time I saw him before he fell sick again... the last tine I saw him before he left us for real.  Being bad in saying good byes, I tried to look away when he stepped out from my house... I wish I acted differently then, but of course... it is just a WISH.  For some reasons, I didn't get the chance to see his face for the last time... and his body had been buried the moment I landed in KT... and that left me with this 'unfinished business' feeling since then.  A feeling that sometimes caused me to cry inside .. because if I really said goodbye that morning, maybe I don't feel that bad now.  

 I know my father wasn't a perfect father, but I know he loved me and cared for me well while I was growing up.  I miss him a lot.  Al Fatihah.

Labels:

Comments

adii said…
Nice blog you have here, giving me insight about your multiple talents.
Monday, July 20, 2015
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I am busy, I'm confused!

I have been very quiet this week.. no updates, no hopping around leaving any trail of my existence, probably due to the following reasons: 1. Nasreen will be having her exam next week, so I’m busy reviewing her syllabus (and also nagging to make sure she prepares herself). Yes, instead of her reviewing her books, the responsibility – by default – is shifted to me…. Hmm, mothers nowadays. We feel the pressure more than our kids (and we panic even more while waiting for the results to come out). Hehehe. I can’t remember my mother even touched my textbooks when I was in Primary 3. No wonder we grow old faster these days…. 2. I’m having mood swings this week. One day, I feel elated, then mellow on the next day, moody on the following day. Work is adding on my desk, scope is being expanded, news is floating around and remarks are beings smacked everywhere (manage to steer clear of some and the rest sometimes just landed right on my very lap). Don’t you hate it when you are so positive that ...
11 comments
Read more

Angels - Mission Possible...!?

Last week was a week full of excitement for me. One, because I was busy with my work, so the week went by faster than usual…. (meaning: less time spent on ‘termenung’ & missing my husband); Two, my hubby dearest was scheduled to arrive on Friday night (3rd March 2006), the more reason for me be thrilled and eager counting the days; Three, me and the rest of March Angels ( Leilanie & T. Ina ) planned to meet up on Friday (3rd March 2006, also) to celebrate our birthdays and Leilanie had this fantastic idea of challenging ourselves to find gifts for the birthday mommies (and the gifts must cost less than 10 bucks each!) – and Leilanie, I must tell you that this challenge really made me sweat all afternoon on Thursday….. hehehe …and Four, me & my husband (and also the children) planned for a weekend getaway to Cyberview Lodge Resort & Spa on 4th & 5th March 2006. There I said it…..nothing much to say about point One & Two…. but point Three and Four…..definitely!!!...
16 comments
Read more
Yes, I’ve been blessed with a lot of wonderful people around me….. yes friends, you! Read on…. Yesterday, around 6.15pm, I was in the middle of reviewing something when I was called for a meeting with one of big bosses here…. And I was thinking in anger, ‘Great! It’s 6.30pm and they want to have a meeting. Don’t they have families to run back home to????” So I got up from my chair and ran down to one of the meeting rooms in Level 5. I peeped through the small glass and the room was dark and empty. They were not even they yet! Heck! But when I pushed open the door, suddenly I heard people screaming and laughing and shouting, “Happy Birthday To You!!!!” and everyone was holding a candle in their hand. Gosh! My colleagues planned a Birthday Party for me. No wonder the department was empty when I left and I didn’t even notice. I was speechless! I was asked to blow the candles that they were holding and those on the cake (oh! The cake was so yummylicious!) I was so touched. Everybody was th...
12 comments
Read more